Friday, August 22, 2008

What a Difference a Year Makes

A year ago, I walked my sweet Cody to the end of the block and hid very red eyes behind sunglasses.  When the bus pulled away, I turned to my husband, put my head on his chest, and bawled like a baby.  It was rough.  The entire day, I battled fears and emotions that were welling up inside:  Is he okay?  Does he like his teacher?  Is she nice?  Is he tired with such a long day?

I needn't have worried.  He loved kindergarten and everything about it.

As I read many of your blogs this week, as you prepare to send your children off to school, I must admit that I have this feeling inside that I can't quite place.  It's not sadness or guilt that we're not sending him to school this year.  It's just....different.  I'll openly admit that I have all kinds of things running through my head and heart this week.  Of course I have doubts! I know this is normal.  The truth is, many of my questions won't have answers until we've really put this year to the test and seen the actual outcome.  

All I have to go on is trust in a God that led us here.  And for now, that's going to have to be enough.

Our school year has begun and week one went great.  Everyone did well, including Caden (this is a huge praise), and today is Friday, which means we're off.  (Fridays are reserved for lots of fun field trips and the practical (necessary) errands.  I know I will need a day to catch up!)  

The kids in our neighborhood are preparing to go off to school and Jerry has started back with meetings.  The fall is winding up with all kinds of new things just waiting to be discovered.

And just like last year, my daily prayers will be frequent and ongoing, for I know I cannot possibly do this without Him.  

And just like last year, no one is more excited than me to see the year unfold.  

And, just like last year, only in a different way, I will still place all my worries in the Lord's hands and trust him for the well-being of my kids.  

The only real difference is that I won't be walking him to the bus.  

And you can trust me on this one:  I won't miss that part at all.  ; )

5 comments:

Julie V. said...

Happi,

Praise God for a good first week of school. Our first week went well too. I'm still trying to figure out how to keep Rebecca entertained during those hours, but i know it will fall into place. Some moments will be better than others and vice versa.

I'm looking forward to all that the Lord has for us this year. What an exciting adventure.

Have a great weekend.

Julie

Kari Lynn said...

I was worried about the kids adjusting to the school year and I seems to be having the most trouble getting back into their routine. Funny how that works.

Kari said...

Glad to hear your first week went well. I'm glad Caden was good for you-this is going to be an adjustment for him as well. Mackenzie has been moping around the house this week-so pitiful.

Tonya said...

I have been having strange feelings about the school year starting too. But I think it is because Monkey will be in school full days along with GG and Red is starting preschool. The house will be so quiet and I'm starting to get sad about that fact. I have that tug at me to really look into homeschooling but I still have lots of fears about it as well. I need to start fervently praying about this.

Also what days look good for you next week? Or the week after. I still have 2 full weeks of summer with all four of my babies.

MorningSong said...

I can SO relate to what you posted here! Last year this explained me to a T! This year is SO different! I am enjoying this year. Last year I felt the pressure of it all, and I believe that is normal. It was a task out of my comfort zone. Sure I had taught my kids MANY layers upon layers of things but could I teach them?? This year I have a year under my belt and I realize I can not teach them without the perfect guidance of the Holy Spirit. He is my guide and this year my ear is more in tune b/c the noise of my 'what if's' is quiet. Sure - I see my own limits but I know He called me to this journey and He will fully equip me as I obey! This year has been TONS of fun. I chose a curriculum this year and boy am I glad I did! That was the little piece of the puzzle that I needed. It accomplishes the little things I felt I missed last year!

I am so excited for you! Once this year is over and done - you will take this step with more rest next year. Once you've been there and done that it is easier to take another leap of faith. The stone is not as invisible as it was last year.

Blessings and fun to you this year!
Melodye